the shadow         in me

This piece was written following the fight with myself and my day, realising the potency of DarkMoon and its exquisite ability to transform anything on its way, the alchemy of my own shadow self.


I awoke at the dawn of confusion 

and then carried it like a bag over my shoulders through the day

I stepped into the heavy clouds of darkness, 

waiting to rain


My head felt heavy with something

and I realised they were just about to turn into showery rain

the cold air blew all around me

and the soil cried with long sighed relief

after the refreshment  of cooling downpour

Black bird in my garden celebrated the moment

afterwards with lunch of worm in its peak


I shivered,  trembling from cold

And I drew myself back

While more storm kept approaching me

My head and neck in pain, the cells


My feet ached and I wailed in tension

my cells readjusting

Another blast of elements was on its way.

Stripping me of my own aging skin

Exposing me to my naked physicality

Mortality of my own brilliant mind

Played right in front of me

While self-compassion craved for a space in my heart


Still I run and I run

Rushed outside like some banshee wild creature

for “breath of fresh air” 

I could not welcome the shadow just yet

I had to resist and my body just went simply stiff

Losing the mind seemed like a 

not great option yet

But the more shedding took place

The more releasing claimed its space

Dissolution of something, some space, some place


Then suddenly, out of nowhere

The Rainbow appeared in the sky

as I watched in disbelief

and soaked in its joyful illumination 

And soon after the night approached 

and I lay down my weapons

thanking my perfect shadow for its long visit today

I placed head on my pillow to rest with peace

finally welcoming the Dark Mother

and her dark Moon watching over me



Dark Moon August 2018