the earth writes upon
Goddess Reawakening The Earth
For some decades, a mysterious presence had been communicating with me. Sometimes I have heard it's subtle message through spiritual revelations, dreams and channellings, at other times it has been a serendipitous encounter on the Internet or the re-examination of a simple jotting in my notebook.
It's voice guided me: opening up new pathways in my heart, body and mind, and making them work together as a whole. It had allowed me to harness vital energies within, and helped me give birth to new creative adventures, including the book I am currently writing.
Early one morning three years ago, as I lay half awake in bed, I heard the same familiar voice. I had been struggling with chronic illness, or as I had come to see it, journeying through the underworld, for seven long years. It had been difficult to make sense of my illness, and the day before I had asked the universe for guidance. What was the purpose of my illness? What was I meant to learn?
The voice I heard that morning was crystal clear and filled with intentionality.
“ Your illness is part of a divine plan, and has been sent to slow you down”, the voice began. “ It is allowing you to take a step back, to create a space for reflection and to birth new ways of being, ways that are in alignment with your true nature and which will allow you to embody your feminine power. You are invited to bring forth the real power of the divine feminine into your body”
Instantly things made sense. Although I had heard similar messages before, I had not always been able to fully understand, or I had resisted, or the time hadn’t been right for me to receive the wisdom within. My mind simply hadn’t been able to see these signs for what they were.
A gentle new energy started to course through me unmistakable and irresistible and I knew that I was being given exactly what I needed to persevere on my soul’s path, dark and overgrown as it then was. To my astonishment I was able to see my illness in a new light, it was benevolent force that had created my illness, not to serve as mere physical dysfunction but as a catalyst for relating to myself and to my body in deep ways that I never previously considered.
I found that I was being led by an invisible compassionate hand to behold, appreciate and love the sacredness of my body in its entirety, even those parts that had been cursed by means of old patriarchal control, the female body being criticised, trivialised, exiled or obscured. Sadly such values have remained in our society today as we have rendered them our own.
My illness was to be the turning point in reinstating my birthright and an expression of authentic divine feminine power inherent in my body’s consciousness. I found myself being guided toward a long forgotten knowledge that regarded the world in many different ways. From a heap of broken fragments I was given a chance to reassemble a beautiful mosaic. It allowed healing to arise out of my body’s innate wisdom and its subtle message would always guide me home.
I knew that it was my fate to walk with my guide, and with her by my side I was ready to enter any crucible. The fire would consume the remnants of my wounded self, my feelings of unworthiness, of being tamed or shamed and I would arise from the ashes a firebird free, graceful and present.
I look upon my connections with the significant people in my life, spiritual catalysts who had inspired me towards deeper learning and soul growth. I look especially upon the women in my life, not just friends and relatives but also those with whom I may have crossed paths just once. Our encounters were not, it seems, just chance meetings but intrinsically woven into my soul’s plan creating a tapestry of intimate, loving and mutually sharing bonds.
And so here I am. My heart full of gratitude for the endless blessings I have and will continue to receive. My grateful for this vital nurturing presence that has appeared on my path of reawakening feminine mystery, for inner compass that always shows the gifts of within, that knows how to navigate through dark terrains, how to persevere and accept what is often hard to accept.
I acknowledge this ever-present devotional companion and her generous protection. I bow deeper to this initiator of the highest order - witch, shamaness, priestess, goddess, mother.
I am her many faces. We are echoes of each other. We come home together with the same yearnings for a life that is fuller, wilder and deeper.